Training from the Wild

My years as an Outward Bound instructor taught me more about people and conflict than any classroom ever could. I worked with participants ranging from 12 to 72, from every kind of background, all over the country. My job was to take people far outside their comfort zones, to help them face challenges they didn’t think they could handle, and to guide them through the discomfort that comes with growth.

Out in the wilderness, conflict shows up fast, and real fear, frustration, exhaustion, and clashing personalities. I learned how to meet people where they were, to really read the room, and to know when someone was ready to lean in and work together and when they needed space and calm. I became skilled at holding space for hard emotions, asking the right questions, and helping people find their own solutions instead of forcing one.

The wilderness also taught me how to adapt. Itineraries rarely went as planned weather changed, someone got hurt, or emotions ran high, and I had to decide, moment to moment, what really needed attention. That ability to stay grounded, to pivot with purpose, and to focus on what matters most is exactly what I bring into mediation.

In both the backcountry and the mediation room, my role is the same: to help people face conflict with courage, to listen deeply, and to guide them toward something they may not have thought was possible: resolution, understanding, and a path forward.

Lexi Roling is a mediator at Conscious Family.