Family Law articles

Clear answers for a hard decision.

A decade of plain-English guidance on divorce, mediation, co-parenting, and the financial questions Colorado families ask us most — written by the attorneys themselves.

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85 articles

Two people talking over coffee at a sunlit kitchen counter.

Money & Property

Featured

The Estate-Planning Conversation to Have Before You Remarry

Second marriages carry the most to sort out and get the least planning. A few unglamorous conversations before the wedding prevent the fight your children would otherwise have later.

8 min readRead article

Family Law

The Biggest Misunderstanding About Mediation

When couples first hear about mediation, they often dismiss it immediately. "That won't work for us," they say. "We're not getting along well enough." This assumption—that mediation only succeeds…

3 min read

Two people talking quietly at a kitchen table in morning light.

Family Law

Advance Directives, Explained: The Documents That Speak When You Can't

Four different documents, often confused for one another. Here's what each actually does in Colorado — and why the person you name matters more than any checkbox.

7 min read

Family Law

What does "conscious" or values-based divorce mediation mean in practical terms?

Who this is for / not for: For couples drawn to a more mindful, intentional approach but unsure what that actually means in practice. Not for those seeking purely transactional legal processing. Our…

2 min read

Family Law

How long does mediation usually take compared to going to court?

Who this is for / not for: For couples weighing time investment against other priorities. Not for those with unrealistic expectations of overnight resolution. Our approach: Mediation completes in…

2 min read

Family Law

How much does mediation cost with your firm (typical ranges and what drives cost up/down)?

Who this is for / not for: For anyone needing realistic budget expectations before starting. Not for those seeking guaranteed fixed prices (every case has unique variables). Our approach: We believe…

2 min read

Family Law

Can we mediate if communication is terrible or we don't trust each other?

Who this is for / not for: For couples who worry their conflict level disqualifies them from mediation. Not for situations involving active abuse or complete communication breakdown requiring…

2 min read

Family Law

Who is mediation best for—and who is not a good candidate?

Who this is for / not for: For couples wondering if they can successfully mediate, even with tension or distrust. Not for those facing active domestic violence or severe coercive control (we screen…

2 min read

Family Law

What is divorce mediation, and how is it different from collaborative divorce and litigation?

Who this is for / not for: For couples seeking to understand their divorce options before committing to a process. Not for those who've already decided their path and need implementation support. Our…

2 min read

An adult and two children walking together on a tree-lined path.

Children & Co-Parenting

Choosing a Guardian for Your Children (Without Losing Sleep Over It)

This is the line that stalls more estate plans than any other. A few reframes make the decision possible — and an imperfect choice beats no choice, every time.

7 min read

A person sitting at a kitchen table with a notebook and coffee, thinking.

Divorce

Thinking About Divorce? Five Things to Do First

Before you hire anyone or move any money, a few calm, early steps can protect you — and set the tone for everything that follows.

6 min read

Co-founder Peter Fabish talking with a client in the Conscious Family office.

Collaborative Divorce

What Happens If a Collaborative Divorce Doesn't Settle?

It's the question everyone asks before signing the participation agreement — and the honest answer has a real cost in it, on purpose.

7 min read

A calculator, pen, and financial documents arranged on a desk.

Money & Property

How Much Does Divorce Really Cost in Colorado?

The honest answer is: it depends almost entirely on how you choose to do it. Here's what drives the number — and how to keep it down.

7 min read

A signed legal document with a fountain pen resting on top.

Divorce Mediation

Is a Mediated Divorce Agreement Legally Binding?

Yes — when it's done right. Here's how a conversation at a mediation table becomes a court order you can rely on.

5 min read

A laptop and a half-finished paper form on a wooden desk.

Family Law

Why Online Will Forms Fail Colorado Families

It isn't snobbery about lawyers. The failure mode is specific, predictable — and it only ever shows up when it's too late to fix.

7 min read

Two empty chairs facing each other near a sunlit window.

Divorce Mediation

What If My Spouse Won't Mediate?

Reluctance is common, and it's rarely the final word. A few reframes — and the right invitation — open more doors than people expect.

6 min read

Family Law

Catching Up with the Culture: Proposed Colorado Legislation would Recognize Pets as More Than Property

For years, family law has struggled with an uncomfortable truth: the law treats beloved companion animals as property—no different from furniture or bank accounts—even as our relationships with pets…

6 min read

A parent and child walking together on a path in warm light.

Children & Co-Parenting

Building a Parenting Plan That Actually Works

A good parenting plan isn't just a schedule. It's a working agreement designed for real life — and the years still ahead.

7 min read

A mediation session in progress at the Conscious Family office, two people seated across from an attorney-mediator.

Collaborative Divorce

Collaborative Divorce or Mediation? How to Tell Which One Fits

Both keep you out of court, and they are not the same thing. The difference comes down to one question: can you speak for yourself at the table?

7 min read

A calm, light-filled interior with two armchairs.

Divorce

Mediation vs. Litigation: Which Is Right for You?

Not every divorce belongs in mediation — and not every divorce belongs in court. Here's an honest way to tell which path fits.

6 min read

A folder of personal documents and a pen on a sunlit table.

Money & Property

What Happens to Your Estate Plan After a Colorado Divorce

Colorado law quietly undoes part of your old plan the day the decree is signed — but not all of it, and the pieces it leaves behind are the expensive kind.

8 min read

Family Law

Making Peace with Your Mortgage: Property Valuation in Mediation

When couples choose mediation to navigate their separation, they're already demonstrating a commitment to conscious decision-making and collaborative problem-solving. Yet even in the most amicable…

5 min read

Parents and a small child at home in warm afternoon light.

Money & Property

Wills vs. Trusts: What Young Colorado Families Actually Need

"Do I need a trust?" is the wrong first question. Here's the better one — and the answer most parents of small children arrive at.

8 min read

Family Law

Holidays after Separation

The holiday season often brings a unique kind of stress that many of us recognize—the pressure of gift-buying, meal planning, and family gatherings. But for newly separated families, this stress…

4 min read

Family Law

Bridging Therapeutic and Legal Support: How We Protect Emotional Wellbeing During Divorce

It's no wonder that therapists feel protective of their clients entering the divorce process. We've all witnessed the emotional toll that adversarial legal proceedings can take—even on the most…

4 min read

Family Law

Training from the Wild

My years as an Outward Bound instructor taught me more about people and conflict than any classroom ever could. I worked with participants ranging from 12 to 72, from every kind of background, all…

2 min read

Family Law

Game-Changing “Moves” in Relationship Transition

As articulated in my short book Heal As You Go, the journey of relationship transition often presents moments that call for a powerful “move” — a pivotal action that one person can take to transform…

6 min read

Family Law

A Decade of Conscious Growth: Celebrating 10 Years of Transformation

When John Hoelle and Peter Fabish first met in 2014, they recognized a shared vision – one that would transform how families navigate divorce and relationship transitions. Starting from a tiny…

3 min read

Family Law

The Challenge of the Victim Identity

It is not unusual for individuals facing divorce to feel victimized by their circumstances. In many cases both spouses enter my office feeling this way. It is easy to understand why; each spouse can…

5 min read

Family Law

The Prayer That Heals

“I’m sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you, I love you.” The Ho’oponopono Prayer, four simple phrases changed what was a turbulent, toxic, self destructive divorce situation into cohesive co-parenting, peace, and friendship post divorce.

5 min read

Divorce

Setting Expectations for Divorce Mediation

A successful divorce mediation process can sometimes hinge on whether the parties have appropriate expectations going in. In our decades of combined experience as divorce mediators at Conscious…

4 min read

Family Law

What the “Respect for Marriage Act” Does (and Doesn’t Do)

“Millions of people, including interracial and same-sex couples, have entered into marriages and have enjoyed the rights and privileges associated with marriage. Couples joining in marriage deserve…

5 min read

Divorce

Make Peace before Making Change

Albert Einstein famously stated that “You cannot simultaneously prevent and prepare for war.” This speaks to a core value that drove us to build Conscious Family: that the mindset you bring to any…

9 min read

Divorce

The Truth about Divorce Costs

Divorce is a terrifying unknown for many people, let alone the added financial strain of the separation process. One of the most common questions we are asked is: “What is this going to cost me?” Why…

6 min read

Children & Co-Parenting

Why Create a Parenting Contract?

In today’s world, prenuptial contracts are common, and are generally binding on spouses with respect to financial agreements. However, contractual agreements about parenting rights and obligations…

5 min read

Family Law

Reproductive Health Care Rights in Colorado post-Roe v. Wade

While several noteworthy and significant decisions have been issued by the U.S. Supreme Court this term, none has garnered more attention and reaction than the recent decision to uphold the…

8 min read

Divorce

Tips for how to talk to your children about divorce

Change can be hard for us all, regardless of age. But being compassionate, loving, and gentle, first with ourselves, and then with our children, is the most effective way through a divorce transition.

3 min read

Family Law

A Peek into a Conscious Divorce Mediation Consultation

When spouses meet me in a legal mediation consultation, it’s an opportunity for them to learn about my background and philosophy, to get a full understanding of how this firm operates, to get a…

14 min read

Family Law

Prenup Property Title Versus Ownership

Sometimes clients who mediate a prenuptial agreement have questions later about how to title a new residence. Every prenuptial agreement, situation, and family is different, but some general…

2 min read

Collaborative Divorce

How Does Divorce Mediation Work?

If you are considering divorce or have recently filed for one, you might have come across the term ‘divorce mediation’. But how does divorce mediation work? What are the benefits, risks, or costs…

10 min read

Collaborative Divorce

The Collaborative Divorce Process

The collaborative divorce process is a more amicable solution than the traditional litigation-based divorce. The traditional divorce process involving litigation is stressful not only for the parties…

12 min read

Divorce Mediation

The Best Mediation Divorce Checklist

A mediation divorce checklist helps make the process of mediation smoother and less stressful for couples that have decided to divorce. Divorce mediation offers a more cordial alternative than…

11 min read

Family Law

The Choice To Heal

When clients come to work with us, I often start off by sharing our Rules of Engagement. These are basic guidelines we ask clients to abide by throughout any mediation process. One aspect I have…

6 min read

Divorce

What is Collaborative Divorce?

Did you know Colorado has a 12% divorce rate in 2021? When exploring divorce options in Colorado, it is not unusual to wonder, what is a collaborative divorce? A traditional litigation divorce…

10 min read

Divorce

How To Prepare For Divorce Mediation In Boulder

When a married couple decides to separate in order to free themselves from a failed marriage, mediation is a good first step to consider. The decision made, it is important for you to understand how…

10 min read

Family Law

Video: Men’s Matters: Befriending Your Victimized Self and Reclaiming Your Authentic Power

Men's Coach and Group Leader Pieter Van Winkle sits down with Co-Founder Peter Fabish for an enticing conversation on the challenges men face in the journey of self-discovery, the cultural narrative…

2 min read

Family Law

What Is Self-Care? By Breck Costin

SELF-CARE - Breck's Definition: The actions you take that provide the catalyst to less “Noise” and greater well-being. SELF-CARE is specific to the individual but essential for all of us. Knowing…

4 min read

Family Law

Video: Dependency in Relationships: Good or Bad?

Peter & Gabrielle team up again to provide us with another informative conversation! Listen in on this live interview recording as they discuss cultural myths about relationships, attachment styles,…

2 min read

Children & Co-Parenting

Child Support Law In Colorado

A lot of people are confused about the nature of child support, and how and when it is subject to modification. The following is a primer on the child support law in Colorado. Theory Child support is…

5 min read

Family Law

Video: Collaborative Divorce as a Transformative Process

Our co-founder Peter Fabish had the chance to sit down and talk with Dr. Erica Ellis, a licensed psychologist with 30 years of experience working with over 1,000 divorcing families. Listen in as they…

2 min read

Divorce

Heal As You Go

Most Divorces are Ugly and Painful. It Doesn’t Have to be That Way. Follow These Three Healing Directives to Thrive and Grow While Moving through Divorce. Divorce takes everything you thought you were…

40 min read

Family Law

The Changing Legal Landscape of Same-Sex Marriages in Colorado

In 2019 I wrote about new developments in the law that had the potential to impact same-sex partners going through the divorce process (read the original article here ). At that time, Colorado…

8 min read

Family Law

Video: How To End It Without Burning Down The House

Our very own, Peter Fabish, had the opportunity to be interviewed by Gabrielle about collaborative divorce, mediation, and how families can get through divorce without burning down the house.…

2 min read

Life & Perspective

Break Ups: If You’re Hurting on Valentine's Day, Take Heart

“Love Hurts.” It was a phrase popularized in 1974 by the rock band Nazareth. It’s also a relatable sentiment for people going through a breakup…particularly one as challenging as a divorce.…

6 min read

Family Law

The Legal Considerations Of Having Children Outside of Marriage

Many younger couples ask me: why get married? One reason couples avoid marriage is because they wish to avoid formal structures imposed by law. But when children are born, the law suddenly has a lot…

12 min read

Divorce

The Flipper

He still has the flipper, I said. The fucking flipper I loved. What do you mean, a flipper? asked Melissa. You know, you flip a pancake or a veggie burger. Oh, you mean a spatula, she said. But I…

13 min read

Life & Perspective

Take Care of Yourself: Tips for Navigating Fear and Uncertainty

In uncertain times, it's natural to experience anxiety and fear. Going through a divorce is almost always stressful; in the midst of social upheaval, it's a special kind of hard. Here are a few…

2 min read

Children & Co-Parenting

Colorado Child Support Update

Beginning July 1, 2020, there are several updated changes to the child support statute that are going to go into effect. The Colorado Child Support Statute is contained within C.R.S. §14-10-114. For…

4 min read

Divorce Mediation

What Conscious Uncoupling Really Means

You’ve probably heard the term “conscious uncoupling” before...perhaps you’ve stumbled on this article because you’re up late on a random Tuesday night, googling this popular term. You know your…

4 min read

Family Law

Are Courts Open During Coronavirus In Boulder County?

As of April 10, 2020, Boulder County courts were rescheduling non-emergency domestic relations matters for dates after May 31, 2020. What that means for filings and hearings.

5 min read

Life & Perspective

The Precious Gifts of Challenging Circumstances

Financial uncertainty. Fear and anxiety. Worrying about what the future will bring. These are familiar to people going through a divorce, and with the pandemic, to almost all of us.

7 min read

Children & Co-Parenting

Co-Parenting in the Time of COVID-19

Possible issues co-parents face during the COVID-19 outbreak and its restrictions, practical tips for approaching conflicts, and an overview of Colorado court closures.

7 min read

Divorce Mediation

Why Separating Couples Should Always Start with an Intention Session

At Conscious Family, we believe most people truly want to show up in integrity, in every aspect of their lives. Our clients overwhelmingly have the best intentions to proceed mindfully when pursuing…

2 min read

Family Law

What 5 Years Means To Us

Five years ago, John Hoelle and Peter Fabish set out to change the way people divorce. This month is the 5-year anniversary of Conscious Family™ Law & Mediation. The traditional marriage anniversary…

6 min read

Life & Perspective

Add Vitamin G (Gratitude) to Your Thanksgiving

“ Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all others. ”-Cicero We all know that the Thanksgiving holiday is about giving thanks. Nevertheless, in the bustle (and stress) of…

3 min read

Divorce

The Impact of Divorce on Children

When I was contemplating divorce, the single hardest question I had to ask myself was, how will it impact my children? I wondered, will it damage them for life? I’m on the other side of divorce. My…

4 min read

Family Law

“How Long Have You Legally Been a Couple?”

This is a Complicated Question (with significant implications) If you have been in a long-term relationship with someone of the same sex and you decide to go your separate ways, you may be legally…

8 min read

Family Law

How to Choose a Divorce Lawyer In Colorado

From my many years of experience as a family law attorney, I can assuredly say that one of the most challenging, stressful decisions for those contemplating divorce is finding a lawyer they feel good…

7 min read

Divorce Mediation

Even Amicable Spouses Need Good Parenting Agreements

Co-parenting with an ex-spouse can be tremendously challenging, even under the best of circumstances. I have been doing it myself now for about six years, and as a family law attorney and mediator,…

6 min read

Contracts & Prenups

Consciously Mediated Prenuptial Agreements

Protect Yourself Without Preemptively Destroying Your Marriage The process of negotiating and entering into prenuptial agreements often puts toxic stress on an imminent marriage, just when the focus…

2 min read

Family Law

Why You Need a Conscious Lawyer

You are facing divorce. This may be one of the biggest challenges you will ever go through. You are trying to chart a new course for your whole life, while simultaneously engaging in an emotional and…

3 min read

Divorce Mediation

Two Possible Stories of Divorce

Sometimes the desire to divorce is mutual. More often one spouse is wanting the divorce and the other is against it or at best is only slowly getting used to the idea. In either case, both spouses…

5 min read

Money & Property

What Do You Need to Know About Coming Changes to Taxation of Alimony/Maintenance?

Most people don’t know much about alimony – a mechanism whereby a higher earning ex-spouse takes care of a lower earning ex-spouse for a period of time, variously referred to as “maintenance” or…

2 min read

Divorce Mediation

Neutrality Meets Effectiveness in the Art of Mediation

Whenever I try look for universal rules regarding mediation, I end up circling back to the thing I love most about being a mediator: that mediation is truly an art, not a science. It’s an art…

5 min read

Divorce Mediation

Conscious Divorce Rules of Engagement

Transitioning out of marriage is often a very challenging time. We’ve found that the divorce or legal separation process is much smoother when people commit to certain ways of being. We ask people…

2 min read

Money & Property

What Happens with a Business in a Divorce?

In many families, at least one spouse owns an interest in a business. One of the most challenging issues when it comes time to divorce is how to handle that business. And one of the most common…

4 min read

Divorce

Video: Demystifying the Divorce Process

Are you contemplating divorce? Divorce is often terrifying, especially when you have no idea what to expect. In this video, Colorado divorce attorney/mediators and best-selling co-authors John Hoelle…

2 min read

Divorce Mediation

The New Wave of Divorce

Most people approach divorce with the sense that it is something dreadful that one simply has to get through. Few have seen it as an opportunity to get a second chance to set themselves and their…

4 min read

Divorce

Divorce May Hurt Your Business More Than You Realize: How to Divorce-Proof Your Business

As a business owner today, you are constantly adapting to change, while also looking to boost productivity and minimize risk and expenses. Divorce may be a huge hidden drain on your bottom line that…

6 min read

Divorce Mediation

Book Excerpt: The Difference Between Conscious Divorce Mediation and Conventional Mediation

The following is excerpted from the book The Collaborative Divorce Advantage, available on Amazon. Reaching a divorce settlement does not necessarily reduce the harmful consequences of divorce. The…

5 min read

Divorce Mediation

Who Watches Out for Me in Divorce Mediation? The Mediator Should.

Many people are aligned in principle with mediating their divorces, wanting to avoid the conflict and expense of lawyering up and litigating. But some wonder if they engage in mediation, who will…

4 min read

Money & Property

Book Excerpt: What are the Goals of People Who Participate in Conscious Divorce Mediation?

The following is excerpted from the book The Collaborative Divorce Advantage, available on Amazon. Many people who participate in Conscious Divorce Mediation are seeking the following: To Create a…

3 min read

Divorce

Video: How to Avoid Harm to Children in Divorce

Peter Fabish discusses whether it is possible to avoid harming your child or children if you opt to get a divorce. Peter Fabish is Co-Founder of Conscious Family™ Law & Mediation, offering…

2 min read

Divorce

Video: Why Use a Family Law Attorney as Your Divorce Mediator?

John Hoelle discusses three things to consider in using a family law attorney as your mediator when getting a divorce. John Hoelle is Co-Founder of Conscious Family™ Law & Mediation, offering…

2 min read

Relationship Mediation

Divorce, Yes or No?

How to reach clarity on an issue of life-changing importance: deciding whether to seek divorce. I wear several hats in my professional life. One is that of relationship mediator and coach, where I…

7 min read